Issue/79/
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THE POINT

No, But Seriously

BY JONATHON KEATS

Illustration by Kate Barnett.

The first time I proposed to open a porn theater was during a meeting with museum curators. My cinema was not meant for humans but for houseplants, which I intended to titillate by photosynthesis: projecting explicit scenes of honeybees pollinating flowers onto their foliage. The curators laughed and agreed to the exhibition, or so I thought. Months passed. Calls were not answered. At last I received an awkward email from the director. “The Board,” she wrote, “has decided that your project isn’t serious…

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